Stephanie Anderson Witmer describes four “self-esteem killers” that otherwise-thoughtful parents inadvertently dole out:

From the day our children are born, we want nothing but the very best for them. We want them to grow strong and healthy, and evolve into confident kids who can tackle anything. Sometimes, though, in an effort to raise our children as such, we take the easier road—particularly in the area of confidence—to shield our kids and ensure that they don’t have to struggle or feel badly about themselves. And sometimes, despite our best intentions, we may do things that actually hurt our children’s confidence and self-esteem instead of helping it.


Witmer gets local family medicine physician, Dr. Deborah Gilboa, to weigh in on the mistake parents make of “focusing on the accomplishment instead of the process”:

What we praise is what our children learn to value, says Gilboa. Focusing solely on grades, for example, teaches kids that A’s are the most important thing—no matter how they get them.

Focusing instead on how hard a child studied to earn a grade encourages him to do it again. The process is where learning and skill-development happens—and where self-worth grows.​

Be more attentive to the child’s learning, hard work and perseverance, Gilboa recommends. “If we praise something we know they did and could do again, that builds self-esteem and confidence,” she says.


Doctor G will be presenting “Teaching Your Children How To Be Respectful, Responsible and Resilient” on March 12 at Temple Emanuel in Mt. Lebanon:

Deborah Gilboa, MD, aka “Doctor G” is an industry leading parenting expert, Family Physician, international speaker, author, and media expert. She developed the “3 R’s of Parenting” to empower parents to raise respectful, responsible, and resilient kids. (


Here’s some more information about how you can attend this special event:

“Teaching Your Children
How To Be
Respectful, Responsible & Resilient”

Presented By:

Dr. G (Deborah Gilboa, MD)
March 12, 2015
7:00 p.m.


As a Family Physician, parenting expert and mom of four, Dr. G gives straight-forward advice (with a dose of humor) that helps wade through the stress, doubt and guilt that ALL parents feel at one time or another.

Dr. G. is often seen on Pittsburgh Live Today

Admission $5.00 if paid in advance by March 1, 2015*
or $10.00 at the door.

One credit hour Act 48 available ($10.00)

RSVP to Amy Pardo at

Location: Temple Emanuel Social Hall

1250 Bower Hill Road ▪ Pittsburgh, PA 15243

(*Send check to: Temple Emanuel
1250 Bower Hill Rd., Pittsburgh, PA 15243)